.Guilty

2. More. Weeks.

I'm finding that the closer I get to going back to work, the more my "mommy guilt" is starting to set in because I'm looking forward to it. I still very much feel mixed emotions as maternity leave has been a blast, but I'm finding myself really starting to get excited about going back to the office and seeing my co-workers again. As much as I love flying by the seat of my pants during maternity leave, we are still fairly structured as I have things planned almost every day this week! I'm having so much fun but I'm definitely feeling guilty about going back to work and leaving him at daycare. This is normal, right?

Even though I'm looking forward to going back, I will miss all of Kendrick's play dates! I never really visualized myself being a "mom's group" type of person, but I am so thankful for the group I found and the people I've met over the past year! For someone who never really had a lot of close female friends, I am so grateful for this network of new moms to be able to bounce ideas off of, vent to, and learn together as our little ones grow up. Although I have found some great friends that I've become close with, I've also found that I don't agree with some people's parenting styles. There are lots of memes and blogs about how we shouldn't be judge-y of other mom's choices as we are all doing what's best for our children and I think that's absolutely true! However...sometimes it's very difficult NOT to judge when someone talks about something that you feel is very wrong or unsafe.  However, I keep it to myself. I've learned to start to take things with a grain of salt and just go with the flow. I felt very judged a few weeks ago when I felt like a woman at Sobey's was judging me for buying Kendrick organic milk. I didn't like that feeling and because I'm not usually very confrontational I chose not to make a big deal of the situation, but I thought it was slightly rude and my reasons for choosing organic milk for my son is none of her business.

On another note, I finally took some time during nap time yesterday to plan my dinners for the rest of the week. Here's what I have planned:

Yesterday: Pasta with tomato sauce and turkey & apple meatballs - a WIN!

Today: Tacos with lean ground beef

Tomorrow: We're eating out so no dinner planned

Thursday: Coconut chicken salad

Friday: Slo-cooker mongolian beef over coconut rice

Saturday: Chicken fingers & fries

I've included links to the recipes that I plan to try. I'm also trying to incorporate some meals that I can share with Kendrick! He's starting to eat more finger foods and less purees, so I've been trying to brainstorm some meals that he can easily eat that can double as dinner for us. The turkey & apple meatballs turned out fantastic and Kendrick loved them! If you haven't already, check out my board on Pinterest specifically for recipes that I've tried and that have worked really well! I usually put in the comments if I've changed anything in the recipe - which is almost all the time because one of my quirks is not being able to follow a recipe. I always have to add something of my own! I also started a board for kids food recipes that Kendrick & I have tried and loved which will hopefully get bigger as the weeks go on!

I've been continuing to work out at Blitz Conditioning twice a week for the past month. I'm feeling pretty good! I'm hoping to continue when I go back to work, I'm just debating on whether I go super early or go right after work. "Mommy guilt" creeps in again here because if I go I won't see Kendrick either in the morning or much before he goes to bed, but I know that I'll schedule to make sure that I won't be missing him for an entire day. I'm going to also take the plunge and buy the monthly pass instead of the 10 pass punch card, which means I'll have to go at least nine times to make it worthwhile so that will help me keep motivated!

xo
-Dianne

PS: I also found a recipe for no bake banana bread bites that I'm attempting to alter a bit to become little pieces of heaven. They are also pretty healthy, and don't take long to prepare which is even better! As soon as I figure out the perfect blend, I'll post it!

PPS: I gave up pop for lent (four days late because I missed the start date). For some reason since I was pregnant with Kendrick I've been craving it and drinking it way more often, and it didn't stop when I had him! I felt like something sweet so I picked up some banana milk instead. I knew it had some sugar in it, but it turns out it actually has a very similar amount of sugar to pop (although some pop has slightly more). How depressing! Oh well. Time to go to Planet Organic and pick up some sugar-free sparkling juice! 

.Productive

Due to the unseasonably warm weather and the snow melting, the spring running bug has caught me a little earlier than normal this year. It's still too icy for my wimpy self to get out there quite yet, but every time I'm driving I think about getting back into it. I need to pick myself up a membership to a gym with an indoor track in the next week so I can start prepping for my first MEC race on March 6th! It's only 5K but it will be nice to get the legs in gear!

Kendrick starts daycare in three weeks and I head back to work! Like I mentioned last blog, I'm feeling very mixed about everything. One thing that I'm trying to figure out is balance. I'm quite enjoying working out twice a week at Blitz Conditioning as a "Morning Warrior," and it allows me to get my work out in before the little dude wakes up. However, when Kendrick starts daycare if I go work out in the morning it means that my hubby will be the one taking him to daycare and I'll miss seeing him in the morning. If I work out after work, there's a chance I may not make it home to see him before I go to bed. This bothers me! But at the same time, since I've started working out regularly I've been feeling really good and don't want to stop. I'm hoping this will get easier once I settle into working 9-5 again and Kendrick has spent some time at daycare. It's just hard for me to imagine going from seeing him pretty much 24/7 to only seeing him for an hour some days!

I'm also quite proud to say I've almost got nap time down to a science! For the first 10 months of Kendrick's life we didn't really have a scheduled nap time. We'd be out and about and he'd nap in the car or sometimes at home and life was good! Then at 10 months I decided to see if I could try and get him down to one nap a day so that he could start to prep for daycare. It took almost the whole month (as he did NOT like going down for naps in the crib), but for the last little while he's been going down like a champ and sleeping for two to three hours! This being said if he has a busy morning and falls asleep in the car at some point, I usually drive around for a bit to let him get at least an hour of steady nap, but for the most part I've just been planning my activities in the morning and late afternoon so we can be home around lunch time and he can go down for his nap. I know this type of thing might not work for everyone, but it's really worked for us! I wouldn't change the first 10 months for the world, as we were able to do a lot of things and I definitely made the most of my maternity leave! I'm very thankful we live in a country that gives us moms a year off after the baby comes!

There's a lot happening this month! In the next 31 days Kendrick turns 11 months, I turn 34, hubby and I celebrate our second wedding anniversary, we're going on a small mini family vacation before I go back to work, and then Kendrick turns 1. ONE! We decided to do a cake smash photo shoot with him in a few weeks and I am uber excited for it! We also decided we didn't want to rent a big space for Kendrick's birthday but had a lot of people special to him we wanted to invite! So he's having 3 three mini parties instead - one for family, one for friends, and one playdate with his baby friends before most of us go back to work. I bought some AMAZING decorations from a shop on Etsy so it just means that I get to use them three times! I know he won't remember his first birthday but we all will, so I'm hoping we can videotape some memories (like Ross & Rachel did on Friends) to show him on his 18th birthday.

xo,

-Dianne

PS: This week I'm going to start prepping for meal planning! I'm going to look at the week ahead, make a grocery list of what we need, and try to go shopping on Sunday. While I'm still home, I'm going to also try utilizing my slow cooker more often so it's less prep work later on in the day. I'm looking forward to this! Hubby and I are both making an effort to work out more so it will be great to compliment that with healthy eating.

PPS: So I'll share with you a little secret... I may be opening up an Etsy shop! I found a decoration I wanted to use for Kendrick's cake smash that was going to cost me $100+ to get it here, so I decided I may try making them myself. I'm going to keep the details sparse for now as I'm not 100% sure how this new adventure is going to go, but I'm excited nonetheless! The picture below is a hint. :)