Struggle

Happy New Year!

Do you remember the last time you felt completely relieved of stress? A time where there was absolutely nothing weighing you down? No matter what life threw at you, you felt fantastic and ready to tackle the world?

I do. It was in February & March of 2014. We went on our honeymoon for two weeks of wedded bliss on the beautiful island of St. Maarten. We got a free trip courtesy of Westjet when I won a raffle at a Mother's Day fundraiser for Wings of Providence which offers help & shelter to women who have suffered from family violence. I literally picked one of the farthest places that Westjet traveled at the time. We didn't really have a budget after the wedding for a honeymoon, so this was definitely an unexpected bonus trip. I hadn't really heard much about the island so going there was a surprise for both of us, and it was nothing short of amazing. Clear white sand, crystal clear blue water, two different countries on one little island, a spot to watch planes literally fly right over your head, and two weeks of pure relaxation. Although we booked some excursions, we had a lot of days where we flew by the seat of our pants and spent the day on the beach or in the pool. We didn't party like crazy and got a good night's sleep every night and besides excursion days we slept in every morning. I came back to work after two and a half weeks off feeling refreshed, clear headed and ready to tackle anything.

As you can see by that date, that was almost three years ago. This isn't to say I've been a stress case for almost three years, but I certainly haven't felt that that feeling of complete freedom and clearheadedness in a very long time.

I knew being a working Mom would be tough. But I guess I never realized how tough! I give props to all of the Moms in my life who've been doing this for years and to those I've met since I've had Kendrick! I always appreciated that it was a challenge but I definitely have a new found respect.

I was scrolling through Facebook yesterday and came across an article called "This is What Every Working Mom Needs To Hear From Her Partner". I admit I was intrigued, so I clicked on it and read the article. Although I get a ton of support from my husband and didn't agree with the entire article, there were a few sentences that really stood out at me.

"I have too much on my plate and feel like a failure. Every area of my life gets 60% of my best. That's a D. I'm failing. Wouldn't you look ragged and old if you were coasting through life with a D?"

"That's all I can muster and I know it sucks, but I will gregariously tackle tomorrow and shoot for an A. Maybe I'll fall short (again), but could you please tell me I'm doing a good job?" 

- Melanie Okana, "This Is What Every Working Mom Needs To Hear From Her Partner"

Bingo.

This pretty much nailed exactly how I was feeling for especially the last few months, but I was unable to put it into words. I've known myself for almost 35 years now and have a pretty good idea of what makes me tick, how I work, and what I can handle. I suffer from major Mommy Guilt - which is essentially every time I miss out on a moment with my son or feel like I need a little time to myself, I feel guilty. I've been a multi-tasker all my life and never had an issue juggling my schedule until I had my son. Neither my husband or I work 9-5 jobs and although we like that type of atmosphere it certainly got a little more complicated to organize when Kendrick came into the world.

Don't get me wrong, having Kendrick was one of the best things that ever happened to me! And I am so, so happy that I became a Mom. But I'm starting to realize that having a family, a full time job, a part time side gig, completing my degree, running, working out, blogging and organizing multiple events can be a little much for one person. I'm a terrible delegator. I like to do everything myself because I have an expectation on how I want things done. I have a prioritizing problem. I like to make To Do lists but never know where to start! I'm one of those people who doesn't like the little number bubbles beside apps on her iPhone, so I'm sure you can imagine how I feel when I look at my iPhone looking like this:

This number was at 0 before I went on maternity leave. Because I wasn't on my computer as often once I had my little guy, I started getting behind on reading my personal inboxes. Note that 95% of these emails are likely from companies that I've signed up for their mailing lists, but this little red number bubble bugs me EVERY DAY! It's just another box on my never ending To Do list that I need to check off. Because of this, I also have problems sleeping and staying asleep at night which leads to being very tired during the day.

One of my goals for 2017 is to simplify my life. I'm still the same sparkly, bubbly, positive person I've always been, but unfortunately it's only about 60-70% of the time. I'm looking to improve that number to about 80%. I am very lucky I have a great husband, a great family, great friends and an overall great support system so I know I can get through this! I started to use some of my Moksha Yoga passes on my week off at Christmas, and felt amazing afterward! I need to get back to going in the mornings and starting the day off right. I still have some time before my girls trip to Vegas, so I want to get back on track and start eating better, doing yoga & maybe even doing some treadmill running to get back into shape and improve my well being.

Do me a favour, will you? If you see another Mom that looks flustered, whether she's with her kids her or not, tell her she's doing a good job. I am 100% sure she'll appreciate it. I know, I would! We'll never get tired of hearing it and you just never know - at that moment she may be suffering from mom guilt, been a victim of mom shaming or may be having an "I'm a terrible Mom" moment. Something small like that could make her day!

xo
-Dianne

PS: I didn't write this post to get pity and I certainly have no regrets. I thought it was good timing to be real about my feelings as it coincides with #BellLetsTalk day. Our mental health is important, and talking about it is the first step!

PPS: Winter is my favourite season. I have an amazing spot in my new office where my desk is right beside floor to ceiling windows that overlook downtown and I love all the sunshine that beams down on my desk. As much as I love the winter and the snow, my workouts also tend to slow down. I love running but I hate the treadmill and I'm too much of a wimp to run in the cold (not to mention I'm worried about injuring my klutzy self by tripping on the ice & snow). It's about this time of year that I start to get antsy and want to start running again. I came across the Jasper Canadian Rockies Half Marathon which takes place on April 8th & I think I might sign up.  This leaves me with just over two months to get training (usually I start three months prior, give or take a few days) and to be quite honest I haven't run since September. But maybe it's time to take a plunge and have something to look forward to! I plan to make the decision in the next couple weeks, so stay tuned!

.Hello

Oh hey blog, it's me Dianne. Do you remember me?

The last time there was a long pause between blog posts I announced I was pregnant...

I'm not pregnant.

I don't really have any other explanation than life happened. In the last six months I ran a half marathon, moved houses, moved offices, helped open Rogers Place, watched my baby really turn into a toddler, got two viral infections and one bad cold in a 2.5 month span and had a cough that lasted over three months, stopped working out, unpacked a lot of boxes, ramped up my Stella & Dot business, left Kendrick for the very first time for over 24 hours, planned a trip to Vegas with my girlfriends to see the Backstreet Boys in March 2017, had minor surgery, and raised money for the Mazankowski Heart Institute - in no particular order. Needless to say, it's been a little busy.

Let's rewind back to August. I didn't feel as prepared as I wanted to be for the Edmonton Half, however I was feeling pretty good. I ended up investing in some new runners a little over a month before the race (Nike Air Zoom Pegasus), and so far they have been very comfy! While I was at the start line I was still trying to decide whether I use the run/walk method or just run it out, and I ended up deciding to run it out. I was feeling ok for most of the race but started to get tired during the last 5K. At 18.5KM the 2:30 pace bunny ran by me and I decided that that I was way too close to hitting my goal to give up now...so I blew by them and almost sprinted the last 2.5KM. I ended up beating my personal best time and have a new PB of 2:28:33. 

Although I was happy, I KNOW I can do better and look forward to next year! I'm still not 100% sure when I'll be ready for baby #2, but for now I'm going to plan to run the Edmonton Half again, and possibly do some of the MEC races again although I was disappointed with their 15K's (aka they didn't have enough race marshals and I got lost on a couple of the routes) so hopefully they do get better in that department.

September and October were a bit of a blur! It was very busy at work and I admit that I let myself fall off the work out wagon. I ate out more, was lazy at night and didn't cook as often, and didn't have the energy to get up in the mornings to work out. I wanted to get back on track in November however that's when I started to get sick. It was viral infection after viral infection, and many trips to the doctor for them to tell me that there was nothing they could really do and it was very frustrating! Thankfully all that Kendrick ended up with was a runny nose for a few days. I did end up going to see my Naturopath who gave me some tips and now that I'm finished the meds for my cough I look forward to getting back on track and feeling better really soon! I also found out that I have 29 leftover passes at Moksha Yoga! 29!!!! It's been...oh I don't know...four or so years since I've been? I think I'm going to try and go this week and see if I can get it back into my routine again. 

We hosted Christmas dinner for the very first time ever at our new home! We moved at the end of August and I absolutely love it. Better neighbourhood, bigger and better house, and we couldn't be happier. We have an awesome bonus room now that is used as Kendrick's playroom and it's fantastic. Not to mention I swear our bedroom is twice the size and has an ensuite bathroom! It was so nice to be able to host Christmas dinner for our immediate families at our place, and we are pumped that the turkey and stuffing turned out and we didn't have to order pizza! :) 

Saw this quote on Facebook today and felt like it really spoke to me. 

I admit, I've been having a lot more "nothing" days lately simply because I've been so exhausted, mostly I think from being sick. Sometimes this working Mom thing is hard! But now that I'm starting to feel better and have a week off after Christmas to recharge, I'm looking forward to getting back into it and starting my New Year's resolutions early this year! My goal is to tone up and lose a bit around the belly before I head to Vegas in March, and I want to accomplish that by doing Yoga, going back to Blitz HIIT training (which I think is what helped me lose the last bit of baby weight at the beginning of 2016), doing stairs and running on some of my lunch breaks and doing some home work outs as well. I'm feeling good about 2017, are you?

It will not be six months before I write again! I promise!

xo

-Dianne

PS: After taking a bit of a break, I really ramped up my Stella & Dot business in November and it reminded me of how much fun it was (and how easy it was to make a little extra cash on the side!) If you are interested in beating the after Christmas blues and want to earn yourself some free jewelry to start the new year off right, email me at DianneCK39@gmail.com or tweet me @StyleByDianne and we'll set up a date! The new spring collection launches really soon and I'm looking for debut hostesses to show off the new line!

PPS: I went Boxing Day shopping today and it was awesome. I know some people don't understand why - but honestly, if you suck it up and go when the mall first opens first thing in the morning, it's not so bad! Maybe I saw that because all the stores I went to had no crazy lines, and I found a parking spot close to the door so I didn't have to bring in my jacket. All the clothes I bought today were 50-70% off! You can't go wrong with that! :)

.Assumptions

So a few weeks ago Brian & I took Kendrick swimming at a local pool. I was sitting in the hot tub watching them go down the waterslide and when they were done they came to see me. This man who was sitting in the hot tub next to me and I'd guess was in his 50's looked at us and said "Looks like he's ready for a little brother or sister!"

Excuse me?

I'd never met this guy before and I'd never seen him before in my life. I was not speaking to anyone while I was in the hot tub, and just sitting on my own watching my son and my husband in the water. What would possess a stranger to say that to someone? Now I'm sure he meant no harm but it was such an inappropriate question that I didn't even know how to respond except for nervous laughter and "haha, maybe one day" as we picked up and walked away. I was super uncomfortable. He didn't know our situation. What if we had been trying for a long time and couldn't get pregnant? What if we had fertility issues? What if we just didn't want another baby and thought our family was complete as three?

This being said, it doesn't really bother me when friends or family bring up a second child. I hope for it happen one day and as I discussed a few blogs ago I'm just not sure I'm 100% ready yet. That's nobody's business but I'm ok discussing it. I guess what bugged me about this situation is that this person didn't know me and asked such a personal question.  I admit that I have asked friends if they are having more children, not thinking about how I might be making them feel if they have suffered a loss or a tough time. I can tell you now that I will think twice before I ask that questions again.

Last week I came across a post by Jennifer Aniston who wrote a long letter through the Huffington Post pretty much saying how ridiculous it was that she had to explain to everyone that she was not pregnant. If you haven't read it - you can find it here, and I definitely recommend it as it's a really good read. I remember when the pictures of her first surfaced that showed her stomach a little bloated, and immediately hoping that she actually WAS pregnant after reading all of the headlines. Finding out that she's not breaks my heart a little because I can't imagine how it must feel to be out enjoying your vacation and having people take pictures of you and plaster all over the tabloids that you must be pregnant because you felt a little bloated. I admit, this is a constant worry for myself. I find that since I've gotten back (mostly) to my pre-pregnancy weight if I gain anything back it seems to be all in stomach. And then I get paranoid that people will start thinking I'm pregnant just because my shirt is a little tight, which makes me rethink what I wear almost every day. I can't imagine having cameras following me around while I'm having self confidence issues!

This line in the article really stuck out at me:

"We don't need to be married or mothers to be complete. We get to determine our own 'happily ever after' for ourselves".

Amen, sister. Just my two cents.

PS: I've said it multiple times in the past couple months but starting Monday I truly AM going to try very hard to go soy free for a month. My body is feeling pretty meh and it really shouldn't be because I've been keeping up with my training for the Edmonton Half. My back pain peaked after my last 15K two weeks ago so I took a week off and it's feeling a lot better. My body though still feels off. I got tested for kidney stones and everything under the sun and thankfully those came out negative. So it's time to start eating better and doing things that are still in my control. It's going to be hard considering we are moving in less than a month but I'm going to try and prepare a ton of freezer meals so that we don't have to eat out all the time.

PPS: This blog is going to go through a major makeover in the next few months! Same great content (I hope), but different site host, name, and branding. There will be more sections including a place for all my recipes, and hopefully an easier way to find blog posts that are relevant to what you want to read. It's a work in progress and I can't wait to reveal it all, so stay tuned! :) I don't have a final date yet but will keep you posted as it's coming along.

.Delicious

I felt I needed to blog strictly because I wanted to share an amazing recipe that I tried tonight. Italian sausage stroganoff. OMG. I can't even begin to tell you how amazing it was because it wouldn't do it justice. More on that later...

I had to head to physio last week because my back was bothering me. In all honesty it's been bothering me for awhile but it hasn't been bad enough for me to actually stop training - until two weeks ago. I actually had to cut a run short because I was in so much pain, which was incredibly frustrating. After going to physio it seems like I had this same muscle injury last year (which I honestly didn't remember at all - baby brain IS still kicking 16 months later), but this time he decided to treat it a little differently. He actually did some acupuncture which I admit, scared me a little. I'm not a very big fan of needles so I guess it was a good thing that I couldn't see them getting inserted in my back. Turns out the treatment worked pretty well as I felt really good for the next three days! I ran my second 15K last weekend and although my back flared up a little bit I managed to get a new personal best of 1:41:45. The best part is that I know I can do better. I wasn't feeling 100% so the fact that I got a new personal best despite that makes me feel really good. I have one more 15K training run this weekend with MEC so we'll see how it goes. I went back to physio today to get some more acupuncture done, so I'm hoping that I'm in really good shape for the weekend. 

The Edmonton Half is fast approaching and I'm still undecided on how I'm going to run the race. I'm either going to run it like normal and go for a new personal best, or I'm going to try the run/walk method and follow the 2:15 pace bunny. I just don't know what I should do! It also happens that leading up to that day we'll be moving out of our house and into a new house AND moving offices. August is going to be slightly busy! This will make lunch time runs all that more important as I feel like it's going to be hard to get up early and I'm not going to have the energy when I get home from work (not to mention that I really enjoy spending evenings with Kendrick!) Bootcamp runs out in the next two weeks so after that I'm going to try heading back to Blitz for morning HIIT training at least once a week. I'm finding that my extra strength training is helping me feel less sore after races so I definitely want to keep it up. I'm going to continue with running 2-3 times a week with a longer run on Friday or Saturday, and also continue with stairs on Wednesdays. I feel like my training is paying off because I've done a few personal bests already this year so I'm really hoping it continues!

I ordered new SHOES! I also ordered new shoes for Kendrick - but in fairness he's gotten just over seven months out of his last pair of baby Nikes so I'm pretty impressed. I had bought Kendrick baby Nikes in the next size up awhile ago but they have been packed away for a few months as we were anticipating moving sooner, so I ordered him a pair of baby Pumas and a pair of baby Asics. I may have a baby shoe problem. For myself, I decided to go with the Nike Air Zoom Pegasus. After my last 15K it was clear to me that my shoes were close to being done, so it was time to bite the bullet and try something new. I thought I noticed my shin splints creeping back up on me the last few months on occasion, so I'm hoping a change of shoe will do the trick. Nike has a great return policy where you can return them within 30 days for any reason, so if they aren't perfect I'll send them back and try a new pair. I'm hoping they will be great and they arrive soon so I have time to break them in before the big race.

I've lost a couple pounds so I'm starting to feel a little bit better. I'm still struggling a bit with work/life balance and getting organized in the few hours I have before Kendrick goes to bed, but it's going not too badly. I'm very thankful! My baby is also 16 months old in a few days. He got his first hair cut last weekend and is truly starting to really look like a little boy. It's a bittersweet time for this mama.

xo

-Dianne

PS: The more running I do the more I wish there was some sort of app that I could have on my phone to alert someone if I was ever involved in an emergency. Not to say that I'm super paranoid as I usually run in very populated areas but if something did happen and someone tried to grab me or steal from me while I was running, it would be nice to be able to press a button and alert someone of my whereabouts. Or, if I say I'm going to be an hour and it's been an hour and 10 minutes, someone would be able to check the app to find out where I am. Is there such a thing? If not, I feel like someone should invent one! It's better to be safe than sorry.

PPS: Ok, I need to share this amazing recipe I tried tonight. Bonus points that it's a one pot recipe, as that makes clean up oh-so-easy! I love beef stroganoff so when I came across this on Pinterest I knew I had to try it. The original recipe is here, however here my adapted recipe with Italian sausage:

1 teaspoon of olive oil

3 cups of fresh mushrooms, sliced

1/2 cup of sliced onion

3 cloves of garlic, minced

1 package of ground Italian sausage

1 tablespoon of smoked paprika

4 cups organic mushroom broth

2 cups of rotini pasta

3 pickles, diced

1/2 a cup of low fat sour cream

salt and pepper to taste

Heat the olive oil in a big pot on medium high heat and cook the mushrooms until soft and tender. Remove and place in a small bowl. Cook the onions and the garlic in the same pot for a few minutes until translucent and fragrant. Add the Italian sausage and cook until tender and browned, breaking up with a wooden spoon. Add the paprika and stir. Then add the mushroom broth and pasta and bring to soft boil. Continue to cook until the pasta is soft. Add in the diced pickles and stir. Remove from heat and add the mushrooms back in along with the sour cream. Serve, and enjoy! Seriously, I feel like I could eat the whole four servings it's THAT good!

.Vulnerable

If you read my last post, I'm sure you noticed that it came from the heart. On occasion, we are all guilty of portraying life as fan-freaking-tastic when it's really not. So I felt I needed to get some things off my chest and truly I did feel a lot better afterward.

Thankfully, one of the stressors has lifted itself! We got the good news that our house had sold yesterday and we are over the moon! It's still a little stressful that we have to find a new place in the next two months, but we've seen a lot of places we like so it's just a matter of making a decision. We are looking for our "almost forever" home - which means we are looking for a place to settle for the next 20ish years or so until Kendrick and one day future baby move out. Then the plan is to build our dream home. There are definitely some exciting times ahead!

Father's Day actually went a lot better this year. I'm not sure what it was, but it didn't seem like there was a black cloud hanging over the day like there was last year. I'm so lucky to have such an amazing man as my husband and the Father to Kendrick!

Photo by Breanne Marie, Edmonton

Photo by Mandi D Photography, Edmonton 

I crushed my first 15K of the season this past weekend! I'll be honest, I don't know why I signed up for a 15K when I was probably only ready for a 10. When I signed up for the race package I tried to up my mileage in the monthly races leading up to the Edmonton half. I should have done another 10K, and then completed my first 15K in July. When I realized my error it was too late to do any changes so I went for it anyways. Considering the course was pretty hilly and through some thin trains at some points, I felt not too bad for the first 12K. The last 3K however were tough and I was struggling. I was also a dummy and didn't eat beforehand, which is a no no especially for a long run like that. Usually under 10K I can get away using an empty stomach and sport beans, but 15K was too long. My longest run previous to this was 9K and although I didn't feel prepared, I actually wasn't too disappointed with my time of 1:46:09. I have another 15K on July 1 (which is actually my favourite race of the year, the Canada Day Road Race) and another on July 10 before the big half on August 21. My goal for this week is to run 9K tomorrow and 12K this weekend to hopefully get my stamina up. I also didn't feel as sore after the 15K as I thought I would, which means my cross training at Blitz Conditioning boot camp is paying off.

Speaking of boot camp, we are outside and I don't know what it is but mosquitos LOVE me. It's awful. Even after wearing bug spray my legs have at least 25 bites on them. I don't understand why they like me so much!

I'm still working on losing about 7 pounds so that my abs show up a little more. It would be really nice to do this before I get pregnant again, as I've heard it's much harder to lose the weight the second time around. I've been keeping up with bootcamp every Tuesday and stairs every Wednesday, and running 1-2 times on Monday, Thursday or Friday. I think the biggest thing for me is eating. I need to be planning better and eating better as I know I haven't been at my best lately. The food prep has been tough, I just haven't had the energy at night. I need to get better at this! My goal is to get back on the meal planning wagon this weekend. I am motivated!

I'm also craving a vacation. Particularly to Disneyworld. One can dream...

xo

-Dianne

PS: I tried out a new Epicure recipe for pancakes for Father's Day breakfast, and it went really well! I literally went on the Epicure website and searched for "pancakes" and decided to try the Whole Wheat Banana Pancakes recipe. The only difference is I added a tablespoon of cocoa to get some healthy chocolate flavour without the calories and the sugar of the chocolate chips. They tasted amazing! I think next time I may try adding some Sweet Coconut Vegan Protein Blend protein powder to the mixture too! I also used only whole wheat flower as well. 

PPS: I think I'm going to invest in a new pair of Nikes next month! I'm brand loyal and I've been using Nike Flex for the last few years and am looking to change it up. Anyone have a favourite brand of Nike runners they recommend? I'm looking at trying out the Nike Free Run Distance shoe as that was rated #1 by a poll I saw, but I am not sure if I'll need more support than that yet.

.Struggle

Truth be told, I haven't felt very inspired lately.

Trying to juggle a 15 month old, a marriage, a full time job, part time classes, half marathon training, eating healthy more often than not and the stress of trying to sell a house and looking for a new house has taken a toll on me. Not to mention around Father's Day I always get sad because I'm missing my Dad. I am tired & I am drained. I gained a couple pounds back that I lost. I haven't been able to sleep more than seven hours for the last three weeks except for maybe once, and this past week Kendrick has been waking up at night or waking up really early in the morning (probably because I noticed a new tooth the other day). Even though I know you can't technically "catch up" on sleep, I haven't been able to fall asleep easily or feel really refreshed in the morning for a really long time.

Sometimes I find it hard to take a big step back and take a deep breath. I need to work on that. My usually spunky positive personality has been a bit more negative as of late, which is not like me.  One thing that has always de-stressed me is running. When I'm out there, I forget everything else and my mind has a chance to wander. I finish my run with a clear head and a smile on my face. I think this is one of the reasons I got hooked on running in the first place!

New, longer blog post coming soon. Tonight, I head to bed to prep for my first 15K of the season tomorrow. I leave you with some food for thought. I think we all need this reminder once and awhile.

xo

-Dianne

PS: I am addicted to Epicure's Pico Salsa mix. I seriously have made it 3 times in the last two weeks. I'm going through tomatoes like I'm going out of style! Quick and easy, the recipe includes tomatoes, cilantro, lemon juice, garlic and Epicure Pico spice. It's incredibly healthy too! If you like salsa, I definitely suggest you order some.

PPS: I can't help but be brand loyal to Nike. Really pumped about my new shirt that I treated myself to today. "There is no finish line" foreshadows the marathon training I will be doing once I heal up from whenever next baby comes around. Hopefully it gives me some good luck tomorrow!

.Confident

I'm not sure what it is, but this past little while my body confidence has gone up quite a bit. I think it's a mixture of people being so kind and telling me that I look great and it doesn't look like I had a baby, and that when I look in the mirror I can see sorta my abs again.

It also seems so mind blowing that almost 15 months ago they cut me open to get my baby out...

I think back over the last 15 months and feel good about the fact that I have worked really hard to get where I'm at. Even though my eating habits aren't really where I want them to be, the amount that I'm working out and doing physical activity is definitely paying off. I know I blogged quite a few months back about feeling a little bit jealous of the ladies who were able to lose the weight really fast after birth, however I'm pleased to say that I'm not feeling that way anymore for the most part!

That being said, the question that seems to be on everyone's minds is...when is #2 coming? I have to admit I'm not there yet. Kendrick is such an awesome baby, but now that he's walking he's a lot of work! I can't imagine chasing him around and having a newborn at the same time. Just the thought of it stresses me out a bit. Some of the moms that I have talked to with two have told me that you just do it, and it's not so bad but it still makes me so nervous! The thought of moving Kendrick to a toddler bed also is nerve wracking because right now he's all over the place in his crib. I can't imagine him actually sleeping in a bed and not getting out the second we put him down. On top of all this, the fact that I'm feeling good is also a reason why I'm not quite ready. It took so long to get back to a place where I'm happy and comfortable with my body, so I'm not quite ready to gain 50+ pounds again! Is that selfish? I don't mean to be. But I know the older you get the harder it is to bounce back from pregnancy so it's constantly weighing on my mind.

I've also made the decision that I'm going to start marathon training sometime after baby #2 comes. I don't think there's a point in starting now when my half marathon time is not where I'd like it to be (I'd like to get close to a time of two hours before I start marathon training, and currently my personal best is 2:33). I've still got quite a few races left this year leading up to the big Edmonton Half Marathon in August, and I'm still debating on whether I'm going to attempt to follow the 2:15 pace bunny or not. I've got a 10K in June and 2 15K's in July to start prepping, so I'm excited! My running this week was unfortunately put on a bit of a hold because of the horrible smoke in and around the Edmonton area that blew in, so I look forward to getting back at it next week. The air quality was only a 4/10 last weekend when I ran my first 10K of the season, and I during the race I didn't think it was that bad. However afterward I could feel it in my throat as it was sore, I lost my voice and my asthma started acting up. I'm still feeling the effects a week later!

I am guilty and fell off the meal planning wagon again! I need to make an effort to take the time to plan each week otherwise dinner seems to contain more calories (fast food) or eaten too late. I did however make a killer meatloaf tonight! This recipe was adapted from a recipe I found off pinterest by Inspired Taste, however here is my adapted recipe including hidden veggies for the toddler.

2 packages of lean ground turkey

2 eggs
2 tablespoons of Epicure Paris Spice
1 tablespoon garlic powder

1 cup of breton crackers, crushed

1 tablespoon of Worcestershire sauce

7 tablespoons of tomato sauce + extra for the top

1 cup of applesauce

1 tablespoon honey

1/2 a cup of flaxseed

1-1 1/2 cups of finely chopped veggies (I used California mix frozen veggies which included carrots, broccoli and cauliflower, steamed them, and put them in the food processor)

1 cup shredded cheese

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Put all ingredients in a bowl and mix well. Put mixture into a loaf pan, preferably one that drains the fat at the bottom (as there will be excess moisture from the cheese)  and add tomato sauce on top. Bake for about 50 minutes. The internal temperature should be around 160-170 when done. It was delicious!

Enjoy!

xo

-Dianne

PS: I ordered a ton of stuff from Epicure this week! I am so excited to get everything! I will be doing another large order in June, however in the mean time if you want to order something you can do so by clicking here. I recommend the Paris spice and the Pico salsa mix! SO GOOD!

PPS: Although I'm overall feeling good, I still want to get back to the flat stomach I used to have and seem to have hit a bit of a plateau. I'm having trouble losing that last pound or two around my stomach! I'm not sure if that's just exercises or just eating better that will drop the last couple pounds. Does anyone have any suggestions?

.Commitment

Hey blog? Did ya miss me?

It's been awhile since I've blogged and really my only excuse is that life happened. My little dude turned 14 months old today. Every day I take a moment to sit and just stare at him and thank God for all of my blessings. I am truly blessed and so lucky!

After a bit of a lull in workouts due to some after hours work commitments (and me just having a hard time waking up in the morning), I've gotten back on track. I've continued to lead a group every week to do stairs for an hour at lunch time once a week, and I'm starting to notice results! My goal is to make it all the way up the 202 stairs without walking and after the last time I made it up 3/4 of the way almost every time! Even doing this once a week has made a difference and it's definitely inspired me to continue to lead this project every week!

I also joined our company running club last week, and wow was I in for a run for my money! I already knew that some of the people running were faster than me (as they mentioned the last time they ran they ran about 10.5K in an hour), but it ended being a great learning experience. I ended up running 7.26K at a 6:12/K pace - which is quite a bit faster than my average running speed. I actually ran 5K in 30:29 - which makes that my fastest 5K...EVER! It made me get to thinking that maybe I'm not pushing myself quite hard enough when I go for runs on my own. If that pace is do-able for 7.26K, maybe it could be do-able for 10! My goal eventually is to get my 10K time under an hour and as luck would have it, I actually have a 10K run booked for this weekend! I plan to do a couple more runs before the big race so we'll see if I can push myself a little harder during training and really kill it this weekend.

On top of running and stairs, I also joined the Blitz Conditioning's outdoor bootcamp! I absolutely love bootcamp, and working out outdoors (despite the fact that all the fluff in the air is making my allergies crazy) is one of my favourite things to do! Unfortunately our first class happened to fall on I'm pretty sure the hottest day of the year which made it a little bit tough, but we powered through and I drank a lot of water! Props to my cousin Adriana for signing up with me so I always have a work out buddy!

Now that our house is on the market, we've been doing some extra budgeting and I started meal planning again! Confession: I hadn't meal planned since my blog post back in March!! Here is myplan for the week:

Monday: Dill Pickle Soup - this actually turned out delicious and was even a big hit for my son!

Tuesday: Slow Cooker Pineapple Chicken - substituting pineapple sauce because I could not find any teriyaki sauce that didn't have soy in it.

Wednesday: Cheeseburger Gnocchi - we had this last week and it was so delicious I'm making it again!

Thursday: Cabbage Roll Soup - this sounds amazing!

Friday: Leftovers or take out

I find that when I meal plan I spend less on groceries as I only buy what I need for the week! I also find it's a lot easier to follow my plan if I prep the night before. Last night I cut up the potatoes, carrots and pickles and through them in a giant freezer bag with the chicken stock and spices. Then when I got home from work today I took it out of the fridge and threw it straight in the pot - which was very helpful and made things easy while I was dealing with a baby toddling around and wanting attention. What are your favourite recipes? If you are looking for some new ones, check out my Pinterest page - I have a section specifically for recipes I've tried and loved!

That's all for now! I've been going to bed late for almost two weeks now so I don't know what's wrong with my body clock. I need more sleep!

xo

-Dianne

PS: I've been thinking more and more about following a pace bunny for the Edmonton 1/2 Marathon and the more I think about it, the more I'm going to do it. I think my problem is I usually start out faster in races because I'm feeling really good, but as I keep going I start to taper off. Maybe this will teach me some planning and have me run a more consistent pace throughout. I officially registered for the race (along with the Canada Day Road Race which is one of my favourites to run every year), so I'm getting really pumped for this summer!

PPS: I started selling Epicure! Don't worry, Stella & Dot is still my main squeeze, but I decided to take the plunge as I absolutely LOVE their products! Feel free to check out the product here - I have an online party open right now until May 21! Happy shopping!

.Clarity

So much for wanting to blog three times a month! If there were 26-27 hours in a day, I'm pretty sure I could fill them all!

Ever wake up one day and all of a sudden see clarity? It's amazing how sometimes something unexpected can happen and completely change your perspective on a situation. I know I'm being vague, but I can truly say I woke up yesterday morning feeling refreshed not from a good night's sleep (what's a good night's sleep?), but because I realized that some things are just meant to be.

It's been three and a half weeks since I went back to work and I'm finally starting to get into a bit of a groove. When we get home Kendrick gets a light dinner, and then we play until bed time. The time between us getting home and him going to bed is only between one to two hours on average, which doesn't leave a lot of time for much else! For the first three weeks I can count on one hand how many times I was able to cook dinner, and most of those times we didn't eat until after 7:30-8PM when Kendrick was in bed. Also, forget about making lunches! There was just no time in the morning (and nothing ready in the fridge) so we were eating out at lunch a lot. The last couple days though I'm happy to report that I'm starting to get the hang of it. I've been able to make dinner and prepare lunches the night before so we can just grab them in the morning. It's healthier, it's quick, and I'm feeling really good that I'm starting to find some balance.

The last couple weeks I've also been leading up a group at work to jog and do stairs at lunch time once a week. One of my co-workers had the idea and I've gone twice now and it's been awesome! It's been a little chilly (which is odd, because before that the weather had been gorgeous for a few weeks) and I anticipate there will be more of us when it becomes nicer. I actually love lunch time work outs almost as much as I love my early mornings (and when I say I love early mornings I mean usually after the work out, not so much when I'm attempting to get out of bed). I'm loving that I can be active in the early morning and at lunch and it doesn't take away the time I spend with my little guy in the evenings. When I weighed myself this morning I was two pounds under my pre-pregnancy weight, which means that I'm three pounds away from my original goal. I have to say that I feel great! All the pants I bought for work on Boxing Day are now a little too big!

While jogging up and down the stairs at lunch yesterday, I found myself thinking about my next half marathon in August. At the beginning of my running season, I always can't believe that I can actually run a half marathon because I'm pretty much starting from scratch every spring as I don't run much in the winter. I was telling my co-worker that I wanted to run a marathon one day, but not until I could run a sub two hour half marathon - which right now for me is shaving 33 minutes off my time. That's a lot! However, every year since I started running in 2009 I've been able to shed a few more minutes off of that personal best (with this year shaving 10 minutes off my personal best). My mind started wandering and I thought about following a pace bunny. For those of you who don't know what that is, people train to run a half marathon in a specific time (some using the run/walk method) and run the race carrying a big sign with the estimated finish time. People fall them to pace themselves and finish around that time. My strategy has always been to run until I'm tired, power walk a bit and drink some water, and then keep going. It's worked for me so far, but I still have a lot of time to make up to hit my goal. I've never really done the run 10 minutes walk one minute plan either, but I'm thinking I might try it with the pace bunny next race. We'll see how it goes!

As good as I'm feeling, meal planning has gone out the window this past month. As I'm starting to feel more settled with everything, I'm going to go back and try it again hopefully after Easter this weekend.

xo
-Dianne

PS: Confession: I am addicted to Justin Beiber's new song, "Love Yourself". I don't know why but I could seriously listen to the song on repeat. Side note: I don't usually listen to Beebs so this is really odd for me!

PPS: After a bit of a stressful day this week, I got home and my hubby presented me with a gift. I think every woman needs one of these because we all have these days!

.Goals

Oh hello, blog.  Nice to see you again!

Let's go back to October. The Vancouver Rock n Roll Half Marathon was a lot of fun! It was a little hilly but it just reminded me that I really have to work on hill training more often. My official time was 2:34:37, which is less than a minute slower than my personal best. Considering the hills and how my training slowed down as I was gearing up for our trip to Australia, I was perfectly satisfied with that! It was also nice to have my husband, Kendrick and my cousin Julia cheering me on at the finish line. The only weird thing is my Nike Running app went a little wonky during the run! I'm not sure if it was because of the sea level changes, but my app's GPS had me running a good 2KM farther than the 21.1KM when I finished. I'd like to think that the 1/2 marathon route was measured properly so I'm not sure why there was this issue. It makes me wonder how accurate the GPS actually is even when I'm running in Edmonton? It was off when I did the Canada Day 15KM race too.

After running the race at 8AM, that night at 11:30PM we left for Australia to visit my sister in law and brother in law! Kendrick did pretty awesome considering it was a 16 hour flight to Sydney. He's now been on 12 planes so far in his almost 10 month life, and for the most part he's been an absolute rock star! I'm so very happy that he seems to love travelling as much as his Mommy. 

Spending a month in another country with an eight month old is definitely an adventure! While we were there he got three more teeth, and learned to army crawl, crawl, pull himself to standing and go from his tummy to sitting up! Although hitting all these milestones was awesome, it made the flight home a little challenging because our little love bug didn't want to sit still! In the future if I was travelling with a baby I would definitely go before they are mobile or when they are old enough to be entertained by a movie or iPad. Overall though the trip was amazing. We got to spend some quality time with family, and Kendrick got to do some amazing things! My highlight was taking a giant boat out for a day trip to the Great Barrier Reef and going snorkelling. I bought medication to help with sea sickness (which I didn't know I had until our trip to Jamaica in 2013) which made the boat ride fantastic! I look forward to going back one day - maybe if/when there is a baby #2!

We've now entered winter (which is my favourite season), but unfortunately winter means I become a little bit of a lazy-bug. Running is my jam, but as soon as the snow and ice come I stop. I don't want to take the chance of falling or injuring myself, and well let's face it: I'm a whimp. I've hit a little bit of a winter rut. I have just over two months left of maternity leave and I'd like to take one more class with Kendrick before I go back to work, so that will be nice. I decided that next week I'm going to try out Blitz Conditioning. They have a 6AM HIIT class (High Intensity Interval Training) that may work perfect as Brian can be home with Kendrick and I'll be home on time for him to get ready for work. The only problem is, 6AM is EARLY! I'm still not sleeping that great (and I still don't have an answer as to why) so I'd have to try my best to go to bed as soon as Kendrick goes to bed to maximize my sleep so I'm not a zombie at the work out. I'm a measly two pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight and seven away from my goal weight so ideally I'd like to hit that goal before I go back to work in March! I still have some passes to Moksha Yoga too that I need to use up. It's been years since I've gone and I miss it!

Speaking of back to work, I'm getting a little anxious when I think about it. I am looking forward to spending time with my co-workers and going back into the work world but it's hard for me to imagine being away from my little dude for 8-9 hours a day, five days a week! I feel like there will be tears. Does it get easier?

Looking ahead, it's hard to believe it will be 2016 by the end of this week! I usually make some sort of resolutions but I find that I don't always keep them. To be honest I don't even remember what mine were from last year! In my blog post from December 28 last year, I talked about planning some vacations and we ended up going on 3/4 I had planned. Likely in 2016 there won't be as much travel as Australia was expensive (but so worth it), but I still have some ideas on how to get out of town for at least a mini get away every once and awhile. I'm going to write my goals for 2016 down so I can hold myself accountable!

2016 Goals

~ Hit my goal weight and maintain it (give or take five pounds)

~ Pay down debt and be in a better position to start 2017

~ Date night once a month where Kendrick goes on a sleepover

~ Save $2000 towards a 2017 vacation

~ Start #365DaysOfGratitude & post at least one thing every day that I'm grateful for

~ Take up a new hobby

~ Blog at least three times a month

~ Run all 7 MEC runs (you can buy the value pack by clicking here) and complete at least one half marathon - obtain a new personal best!

I feel like if I can accomplish all of these I'll be not only a better person, but I'll go into 2017 with a fresh, positive outlook! What are your goals for 2016?

xo

-Dianne

PS: I need to do some baking! We went to State & Main for brunch this past weekend and Brian had banana bread french toast. It was amazing, and definitely do-able. Now I'm inspired and want to try it... Kendrick is starting to eat more finger foods and he already likes bananas so I think this would go well! Now to scour Pinterest for the perfect recipe...

PPS: Stella & Dot is having a fabulous sale! Check it out - www.stelladot.com/DianneCK. If you find you like everything, consider hosting a trunk show in January so you can earn some bling for free. :)

.Gratitude

"When sunlight is fading

the world will be waiting for you.

Just show 'em what you're made of."

- Backstreet Boys, "Show 'Em (What You're Made Of)"

I realize it's been a long time since I've blogged. Life happens! It's been a month of ups and downs and my running has been taking a back seat unfortunately. That being said, my body is holding on pretty well and I'm keeping my pace up! I ran 10K on Thanksgiving Monday before getting a turkey cramp (which was pretty impressive that it took that long considering all of the food I've eaten in the past two days) and am feeling pretty good about the Vancouver Rock N Roll Half coming up in less than a week! My goal is going to be 2:30. I haven't been able to train as much as I want but when I have been running my times have been good. As long as I can make it through without cramping up I'm thinking very positive. This will be the end of running season for me so I want to finish with a bang! :)

I've made a decision that I have to go back to running in the morning. In my last two night runs even though I thought I gave myself enough time between meals, I cramped up and had to cut my run short and that's a real pain when you're on a runners high! I actually ran a 32 minute 5K yesterday which was pretty good for me, but had to walk and stretch it out afterward because the cramp was so bad. I never get cramps running in the morning! It's just so hard to get up! I have been taking 1/2 a dose of melatonin before I head to bed and it's been helping me fall asleep which is good, however I'm still waking up more often than not during the night. Kendrick seems to be going into a little bit of a sleep regression as he's waking up 1-2 times a night for his soother, so hopefully that ends soon and I can start getting a little more sleep!

I'm starting to create a list of things to pack for our big trip! The packing is giving me a bit of anxiety, which is why I'm making a list. We've been getting such beautiful weather here in Edmonton, but the bonus of this time of year is that I can start packing all of my summer clothes! Our Australia trip will be the longest I've ever been away, with the second longest being when I went to London in 2012 and was gone for 25 days. 

The good news of the week, I'm only three pounds away from the weight I was when I found out I was pregnant! This means that I'm nine pounds away from my goal weight! The bad news is, none of my old jeans fit! Pants in general are my nemesis right now as I only have a few pairs that actually fit me. When I look in the mirror I feel like I look close to the same as I did before, but my clothes say otherwise. My little dude is worth it though, and it means I get to do some shopping before I go back to work in the new year!

Kendrick has been growing like crazy! He's so close to crawling and he's been working on sitting up for awhile now. He pretty much mastered it on Thanksgiving weekend! He's also eating like a champ! I've become an expert baby food maker too! We are lucky that Kendrick will eat pretty much anything. On thanksgiving he tried little pieces of turkey! He got more on the floor, in his hair and on his face than he did in his mouth but it was a pretty fun experience anyways.  I've been doing a mixture of my own baby food concoctions along with some packaged Baby Gourmet organic food to make sure he likes it. Although I love feeding him home made food because I know exactly what's going in it, while we travel it will be a lot more difficult to make baby food! So I did some research and checked a lot of labels and settled on Baby Gourmet. I'm already impressed that Kendrick likes things like pumpkin! So far, it doesn't seem like he has any allergies so fingers crossed it stays that way.

I'm gonna try to blog on the road when I'm gone if I can get wifi access! So excited for this trip of a lifetime as it will be our first time down under! :)

xo
-Dianne

PS: I made some pumpkin cheesecake for thanksgiving and had a ton of leftover pumpkin, so I added some to my oatmeal lactation muffins recipe! I also added two bananas instead of one which made them much more moist. I still have pumpkin left so I'm thinking of making some banana pumpkin bread or something before I go. I can always freeze it so it's a treat when we get back!

PPS: I'm thinking of doing a gratitude challenge. I did #365DaysOfHappy last year and into this year and coincidentally it timed out almost perfectly with Kendrick being born. I'm thinking of doing #100DaysOfGratitude. I think it's important to be thankful for the good things we have because some people aren't so lucky. Stay tuned to my twitter page in the next few days if you'd like to follow along!

.Faster

2:33:27

That's a full 10 MINUTES FASTER than my last personal best in 2013. 10 MINUTES! I'm sitting here a little over two weeks later and I still am not quite sure how I did it.

The Edmonton Half Marathon went really well. I worked my way up near the front of the pack at the start and slowly made my way to the side and kept up a good pace. My second kilometre was my fastest at 6:16, and my slowest kilometre was at the 19K mark at 7:49. I ran 5K in 33:35 which for me is pretty good! Ideally one day I'd like to get that under 30 minutes and get my 10K time under an hour; I'll get there eventually. The best was seeing Kendrick at the finish line! He did catch my eye for a split second as I ran by him and my friend Krissie who was gracious enough to watch him while I ran since Brian was out of town, and that was the best. I sped up and sprinted across the finish line. I could tell I really pushed it hard because my body felt like it was going to fall apart! I definitely need to do more cross training, especially since the Red Deer Super Spartan Race is coming up this weekend!

I wasn't expecting to beat my personal best by so much time especially 5.5 months after Kendrick, but now that I've done that I think I want to go for another personal best when I run the Vancouver Rock N Roll Half at the end of October. Originally I was thinking of having a goal of 2:20, but the race is less than two months away so I'm thinking a goal of 2:25 or 2:30 might be more realistic. I am so happy that the weather is cooling off, but I have to say I haven't been motivated to run lately. I've been tired and waking up in the morning is hard when the baby sleeps in (I know, I know, I am VERY lucky to have a baby who sleeps!). I'm going to go for a few runs and mix in some strength training this week so I can prepare for Spartan on Saturday, and then I'm going to get back and focus on my running again so I can aim for that personal best!

This also has me thinking about running a full in the next few years. One day there will hopefully be a baby number two, and I've heard that it's harder to lose the weight the second time so I'm thinking of possibly training for one next year. I think Vancouver will be a good pace marker in my decision, as if I can beat my personal best again it will provide me with a little more motivation! Right now when I finish running my lungs go back to normal pretty quick (even with my asthma) which to me means I can keep going. My body however is cramped, sore and I'm in pain. The soreness lasts usually a day or two and this has happened to me the last two times I've beaten my personal best. To me this means that I have to up my fitness level in other areas, such as strength training. When I used to do gymnastics we would do at least an hour of conditioning after every practice, so I'm thinking I'm going to start incorporating some of that in after every run to make my body stronger. I don't think I want to attempt a full marathon until I can get my half time under 2:15, but we'll see how I feel at the end of October.

According to my Nike Running app, my shoes are at 432 KM.

That doesn't include of course a lot of the walking I've done so I'm sure I'm close to 500 which means it's time for new kicks! I love the Nike Outlet because you can get such good deals on last year's shoes! I've been wearing Nike Flex Running 2013's, and I managed to find the same pair today (just different colours) for $49.99. WOO HOO! I tried on some other shoes and didn't like them nearly as much, so I'm sticking with what I know! I also may have bought Kendrick some baby Nike's as they were on sale for $20 and I couldn't resist. They are so darn cute!

xo
-Dianne

PS: Kendrick and I went to cheer Brian on at Tough Mudder this weekend in Drumheller, AB where the weather was absolutely terrible. It was +8 and raining the whole afternoon! I made the last minute decision to throw my Baby Bjorn carrier in the suitcase as I've been meaning to try it out with Kendrick for months. It ended up being one of the best decisions I've made all weekend! We figured out how to use it on Friday night and on Saturday I used it to carry Kendrick around while we waited for Brian to finish. AMAZING! There was so much mud it was disgusting, and seeing people push their strollers caked with mud was even worse. Instead of worrying about the stroller, Kendrick was snug as a bug next to my heart with two layers and a blanket on top with a touque. This also freed up my hands so I could carry an umbrella! He absolutely loved looking at everything and even took a couple of naps. I wish I would have started using it sooner! Does this make me a granola mom? Today we took Thor for a walk and he babbled and kicked the whole time. I also did some squats, and  with Kendrick being about 15lbs now it was a good work out! I never got into the woven wraps but I do really like the Baby Bjorn and will definitely be using it more often!

PPS: Since my banana peach oatmeal (lactation) muffins were such a hit, I did some pinteresting to see if I could come up with a new recipe to try out. I am close to perfecting a maple carrot cake version, so stay tuned! I'm hoping to post it next entry. 

.Lessons

Lesson learned this week: Running with a stroller is HARD!

Obviously baby brain is still affecting me considering I thought pushing a 53.5lb stroller with an almost 15lb baby in it while running and keeping up my pace would be a walk in the park. NOPE! 

We decided to go swimming on Thursday so I thought it would be good to get a run in and run to the pool. I tried putting Kendrick in just the stroller portion without the carseat, but he's still too small and the straps didn't keep him from moving. The time of day also meant the sun was right in his eyes, so I opted to keep him in the car seat so I could provide adequate shade and he'd be nicely tucked in. He's 5.5 months old now and can hold his head up very well so I wasn't concerned, plus the route I had in mind was mostly smooth gravel and wasn't too bumpy. 

When I started to run I realized that it was a lot tougher that I expected! Any small incline seemed like a hill! I managed to keep my pace up however I took many walk breaks. It took a lot more out of me than I thought! I got a thumbs up from a senior on a bike, and a high five from some teenagers on the way. I arrived at the pool covered in sweat even though it wasn't that hot out. Kendrick I assume enjoyed himself because he slept through pretty much the whole thing. I'm impressed with the work out and after I finish the half marathon on Sunday I'm definitely going to be running with the stroller more often, especially now that it's getting cooler! I went for another run today when it was nice and cool outside and my little buddy was pretty pumped to wear his Snoopy toque!

My pace was slower today (also because of the race tomorrow I didn't want to push it) but I took less walk breaks so I was pretty satisfied! The weather was at about +11 when I left and for me it was perfect. 

It's been hard to run four or five times a week as my Nike running plan suggests, but I still have been going 2-3 times a week. My pace for July averaged 7:28 and for August 7:31 and although I still feel a little slow it's not too bad. I just keep reminding myself that I had a baby five and a half months ago, so let's be realistic. The peak of my training happened on August 8th where I ran 19 KM. My recovery was fantastic and I actually wasn't that sore the next day, so I consider that a really big win. I'm also going to download Spotify Premium so that I can start looking for some fun playlists to run to. It also times out perfectly so that it will expire the day we get back from Australia, so I'll have unlimited music to listen to not only prepping for my next half, but also on all the long plane rides!

Last week I was really nervous for the Edmonton Half but now I'm starting to feel more confident. It still flip flops from time to time but I'm starting to visualize finishing and it's making me feel a bit better. Also knowing that I will have a few people cheering me on from the sidelines makes a world of difference! I packed my bag for tomorrow, picked my outfit, and really am as ready as I can be.  I felt this shirt was best suited for tomorrow!

My goal is to finish before 2:58 (which was the time of my very first half in Vegas in which I trained way less). I have a tiny little bag of cherry blasters that I plan to eat as my reward when I finish!

xo

-Dianne

PS: I did go see the doctor about my sleep issues. Essentially he asked me a whole bunch of questions and doesn't think I have postpartum depression which is a good thing. He suggested taking some natural sleep aids on occasion, and also to move the baby monitor to the other side of the room (or out of the room completely) so that I wasn't compulsively checking it. Moving the monitor was tough, but it's now in a place where I can't reach it and that has helped a little bit. My sleep is still not the greatest but it's definitely better than it was. My brain just doesn't want to shut off! 

PPS: I've got a pretty bruise on my leg from a wipe out two weeks ago. I was running through a crosswalk during rush hour traffic, tripped over an invisible line and wiped out. I landed mostly on my hands (of course I wasn't wearing pants with any pockets so my phone went down first and I cracked the screen) and on my left knee. My right ankle was slightly twisted as well, but I didn't feel that until the next day. When I fell I was so embarrassed that I jumped up and kept running for another 1/4 kilometre so I was alone again, then walked the rest of the way home. I was so mad and upset I didn't even post the run to Facebook like I usually do. Usually when I get outside I feel better even if I'm a little tired, but my body was just not feeling it and I pushed myself to get out there anyway. Lesson learned. :)